Patuloy na tumatakbo sa madilim na lugar na ‘di mo mawari.
Buong puwersang kumakawala sa kadena na ikaw mismo ang nagtali.
Kasabay pa ng pakiramdam na para bang mag-isa pero ‘di mo maamin.
Takot sa bulong at sulyap ng mga tao sa paligid.
Paano nga ba tumakas sa rehas na ikaw ang mismong nagtayo?
Sino nga ba ang tunay na sayo ay magtatayo?
I am fragile. My depression is insane—selfish. She wants all the attention in the world.
She wakes up so late in the morning because she likes to stare at the ceiling at 3 am. She doesn’t want to attend my classes, school works make her sick. She eats a lot. She loves to lie at my bed all day. For her, even the simplest tasks are too overwhelming. She’s so quiet and so lazy. But most of the times she’s undeniably crazy. She cries a lot and I don’t know why. When my dog peed on my bed, she cries. When I lack a piece of coin, she cries. When someone shouts, she cries. When something is missing, she cries. When she sat, she cries. When she sleeps, she cries.
She wants to escape this world…with me. I said, “No”—and she mumbles. She is sad just like I am. She is misunderstood. She is ignored. She stares at the passersby who don’t care.
I need your help
I think I lost my soul
Last time I saw it
It was hanging from the ceiling
I am the center of attraction. Everyone I had loved and cared about are either sitting or standing in front of me. I never thought this moment will ever happen. They are silent. Some are just staring at where I am and some are having small talks with the persons next to them. It’s my first time hearing them talk good stuffs about me; my family, my closest friend, and even my acquaintances—this is unbelievable. I remember that I refused to have a party before to celebrate my eighteenth birthday to avoid this too much attention, but now it’s happening.
Everyone laughs when my friends retells the silly things I did before, everyone is reminiscing the old memories we had. Am I supposed to be glad now or not? Everyone went completely silent when they saw my mom walking towards the platform. She is holding a face towel and a folded piece of paper in one hand—guided by my father. She exhaled so deep before finally grabbing the microphone. “I would like to give thanks to everyone who went here, today, you are all gladly appreciated” she stutters.
Continue reading “The Gathering”
As I grew older
Everything started to make sense
I slowly becoming aware
Why people drowns themselves on alcohol
Why people smokes despite knowing its cons
Why people puts permanent marks on their wrists
Why people takes too many pills
Why people secretly hides a rope under their beds
Continue reading “This World Is Mad”
This is me
The piece you are reading
This is how I cry
This is how I scream
This is how I put myself together
I wrote this on the last page of my journal
Where things are usually untidy
Forgive me if you can’t quite understand
Because neither can I
Continue reading “I am the Metaphor”
I had died my first death
On a day between September and October
This is how it goes:
It was night time
The moon gloomed outside with the stars
The street was silent that the whipping of the wind seems loud
All throughout, it was pretty scary
It would be a perfect scene for a murder
Continue reading “First Death”